so true...

"Challenge me, label me, it's what you do best. Categorize me, does that comfort you? My blood, my body is mine and let me decide who I am. No lies, no prize, just truth. My skin is not a book, don't judge me by my cover. It's not up to you anymore. I'm not asking your permission. I am not asking for your advice. I know who I am, where I belong and who I claim. Forget your rules, your standards. My skin may deceive but I know where I come from. My blood doesn't lie. If you want to know who I am. Ask." - vi.sualize.us

beautiful

Awesome photography from : visualize.us

HAPPY!!!!!

HAHAHA.. I'm so HAPPY!
Have I really lost weight??? LOL!!!

Cos yesterday Jess saw me at uni.. and she told Joey that I lost alot of weight.
N today I went back to my ex-landlord's house to get some of my stuff back.. n his gf, quinee told me that I look slimmer. HAHAHAHAH!!

OMG! so happy! But actually I dont really feel slim at all..I still think my face is damn round hahaha. My face's always round la -.- -.-

Then I was telling Faye, Sophia and Audrey that no wonder someone said I became prettier HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Hope I stay like this for as long as possible... I don't wanna gain weight!!!

-.- -.- not again?

Guess who I met again today? MXZ -.- -.- -.- -.- -.-

I was walking along flinders.... rushing to somewhere else. n I heard someone calling my name.. N I turned around n saw him -.- -.- -.-
N i said "eh...?" in a surprise tone.. then I continued walking...

-.- -.- -.-

I realize my friends around me dislike him more than I do..
You know.. when I tell you ppl stuff, I'm just grumbling, n letting out my emotions.. i just need ppl to listen and give me support.. But I think I indirectly give everyone a v bad impression of him..
I don't think he's a very bad person, in fact I think he can be a very nice friend, but definitely not a good lover..

I'm saying this now cos I feel kinda bad for writing n telling ppl stuff about him that kinda ruin his reputation... I think I'm evil.. hmm...

'laosai'

Well well.. the story goes like this.. :)

Maybe some of u may disagree of what I did.. But am just sharing my happiness with everyone!!!

Like I've mentioned on Twitter.. 'that kinda happiness feels as though i finally lao sai after months of constipation!' hahahaha.

So yesterday, met up with MXZ to take back my fav webcam.. N to return him 2 big bags of his stuff. Thanks to my housemates : Sophia & Audrey (also uni friends) & Faye.. cos they helped me to carry the stuff all the way to Flinders Station.. where we met MXZ.

While on the train, they were so cute.. they taught me how to make that guy wait longer at the station.. HAHA. Then they also told me that I should leave the stuff at the station.. N let him carry all the things by himself back to his apartment.

Finally, we arrived at Flinders station, and MXZ came. He asked if I could help him carry some of the stuff back to his apartment.. Since he asked, and I dunno how to turn down, so I said ok.. and told my friends to go to Melb Central first, and I would meet them later.

So it was just me n him. Wasn't as awkward as I thought. Cos it seemed like somebody has forgotten what he did to me. He treated me the same as LAST TIME -.- -.-

When we reached his place, I wanted to leave right away.. But he told me to stay for awhile.. so I was like "ok.. fine.."
Then he started sorting n packing his stuff.. N asked me to help -.- -.- N I was like "ohhh.. so u told me to come.. just to help u pack??" Then he replied "ok then, u sit there.. "

At one point, he threw a 20-cent coin to me n said "留做纪念吧~" (liu zuo ji nian ba..)
Immediately I replied "我不稀罕!！" (wo bu xi han!!!) N threw it back to him. HAHA! N told him that if he gave me 50 bucks instead, I would keep.. N he threw a 50-cent coin to me -.- -.- -.-
Then I saw a 100 US dollar on his table... N I said I wont mind keeping that. LOL.

And and.... Somebody said I became prettier!! HAHAHA!!! N I told him "通常single的时候会比较漂亮~" (tong chang single de shi hou hui bi jiao piao liang) Hahahahhaha..
Then he asked if I did something to my hair .. n he tried to touch my hair... n I took a few steps back. He gave me that "why do u have to react like this" kinda look.. N I was thinking to myself "just too bad man :P " hahahahah. I'm so evil right?

He went on to tell me lotsa stuff about his school n friends... n showed me his drawings.. n even his atm receipt -.- then I said "oohh.. 某人变有钱了。。人也变了" (mou ren bian you qian le.. ren ye bian le) N he said that cos he hadnt pay his school fees.. after paying, he wont have much left..

hahaha. that's about all that I have to share.. hahaha. I 'suan' him until v shuang!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HAPPY!!!

HAHA!! SO HAPPY TODAY! Hahaha. I have stories to share! I think I was quite cool just now. LOL!!!!! It wasn't as difficult as I thought.. :)

..... -.-

Frankly speaking, I'm nervous.I don't know if I can keep my cool later.
My worst fear is to see him and cannot control myself, be it, hitting him or my shaken emotions.. I know it's crazy, I shouldn't waste time thinking of how to react in front of him, I just gotta to be normal. But what's normal now? A normal human reaction is to punch him in the face? Or.. giving him a cold shoulder? Or.. ..? I have no idea. It's stupid.. cos maybe he just couldn't be bothered and right now, I'm worrying about the things I shouldn't care.

This week.. probably thurs , I'm gonna meet mxz to take back my webcam.. n i might just pass him all his stuff.. n don't ever see him again (if it's possible)
For some strange reason, I feel kinda scared. I have no idea what I'm afraid of, well..why should I..when I did nothing wrong in the first place? But I figured.. perhaps I'm afraid that I might accidentally reveal some kinda emotions that I didn't mean to show? Like.. sadness? I don't want my emotions to betray me. I wanna be cool and pretend like I didnt give a damn. Actually I'm so scared to see his reaction. What if his reaction totally took me off guard? N I end up doing things not according to my plan?
I don't think I have anymore feelings for him. I guess I'm still on ANGER/EVIL mode. I just wanna win I guess.

Everything Happens For A Reason

"Sometimes people come into your life and you know right away that they were meant to be there…to serve some sort of purpose, teach you a lesson or help figure out who you are or who you want to become. You never know who these people may be but you lock eyes with them, you know that very moment that they will affect your life in some profound way.

And sometimes things happen to you at the time that may seem horrible, painful and unfair, but in reflection you realize that without overcoming those obstacles you would never realize your potential, strength, will power or heart.

Everything happens for a reason. Nothing happens by chance or by means of luck. Illness, love, lost moments of true greatness and sheer stupidity all occur to test limits of your soul.

Without these small tests, life would be like a smoothly paved, straight, flat road to nowhere safe and comfortable but dull and utterly pointless.

The people you meet affect your life. The successes and downfalls that you experience can create whom you are, and the bad experiences can be learned from. In fact they are probably the most poignant and important ones. If someone hurts you, betrays you or breaks your heart, forgive them because they have helped you learn about trust and the importance of being cautious to whom you open your heart.

If someone loves you, love them back unconditionally, not only because they love you, but also because they are teaching you to love and open your heart and eyes to little things. Make every day count. Appreciate everything that you possibly can, for you may never experience it again.

Talk to people whom you have never talked to before, and actually listen. Let yourself fall in love, break free and set your sights high. Hold your head up because you have every right to.

Tell yourself you are a great individual and believe in yourself, for if you don't believe in yourself, no one else will believe in you. Create you own life and then go out and live it."

Adapted from Dobhran

Folly, Dandenong

It took me ages just to upload these pics -.- the internet is freaking slow -.- -.- -.-

Anyway, I went to Folly Blueberry Farm at Dandenong with Audrey, Sophia, Michael and Kim Hui. We get to pick our own berries!!! Heehee..

I always wanted to pick berries!!! Last time I used to read alot of Enid Blyton stories.. and there was this story about a kid picking berries and making pies... I wanted to do it at that time.. but there isn't any berry farms in sg -.-

Well well.. it was fun at the berry farm!! N the spiders made our experience more interesting! We kept shouting n screaming when we saw spiders in our buckets of berries hahahaha.

After picking berries, we went to somewhere around Mount Dandenong to have picnic.. :)
















OMG. The lousy internet connection is getting on my nerves!!!! arghh..

There r so many pics I wanna upload..... But it's taking too much time!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Maybe I'll upload next time.. provided I still rmb haha..

-.- -.-

internet connection sucks -.- -.- -.-
will blog when it gets better :)
prolly i will wake up at 8am tmrw just to update my blog hahahahah

Love & Infatuation

"Love is friendship that has caught fire. It takes root and grows, one day at a time.

Infatuation is marked by a feeling of insecurity. You are excited and eager, but not genuinely happy.
There are nagging doubts, unanswered questions, little bits and pieces about your beloved that you would just as soon not examine too closely. It might spoil the dream.

Love is the quiet understanding and mature acceptance of imperfection. It is real. It gives you strength and grows beyond you - to bolster your beloved. You are warmed by their presence, even when they are away.

Miles do not separate you. You have so many wonderful little films in your head that you keep replaying.
But near or far, you know they are yours, and you can wait.

Infatuation says, "We must get married right away. I can't risk losing them."
Love says, "Be patient. Don't panic. Plan your future with confidence."
Infatuation has an element of sexual excitement. Whenever you are together, you hope it will end in intimacy.

Love is not based on sex. It is the maturation of friendship, which makes sex so much sweeter. You must be friends before you can be lovers.

Infatuation lacks confidence. When they're away, you wonder if they're cheating. Sometimes, you check.

Love means trust. You are calm, secure and unthreatened. They feel your trust, and it makes them even more trustworthy.

Infatuation might lead you to do things you will regret, but love never steers you in the wrong direction.

Love is an upper. It makes you feel whole. It completes the circle. It fills the empty space in your heart.
Love is elevating. It lifts you up. It makes you look up. It makes you think up.
It makes you a better person than you were before. If you have love in your life, it can make up for a great many things you don't have. If there is no love in your life, whatever else there is has a lot less meaning. The secret of our being is not only to live but to have something to live for.

INFATUATION

Infatuation is a feeling; real love involves a commitment also. Infatuation is just love of emotion. Real love, though, is love of devotion. Only the emotions are affected in infatuation, but in real love both the emotions and the will are involved. Next, a person "fall into" infatuation, but "grows into" real love.

Guys, have you ever seen a girl who was so beautiful that you thought you'd faint?
This is infatuation! It is based totally on physical attraction. often you don't know much in-depth about the person you so-called love. Thus, infatuation is mostly biological. Also remember, never tell a girl you love her, unless you are willing to marry her.

Then, infatuation is basically selfish where real love is basically selfless.Infatuation is more interested in satisfying yourself and the feeling than it is in the other person.

Real love is primarily interested in the other person. It seeks to give instead of get.. Love unselfishly seeks the highest good for the other person.

Lastly, infatuation is weakened by time and separation where real love is strengthened by time and separation.
This does not mean that there will be no pain in separation. On the contrary, there is great pain in separation if
you are truly in love."

adapted from: benedistsantos

So now i know what it was........... it was INFATUATION!

Good Chinese Tea

The Angmoh landlord's sis wrote this on the container.. "GOOD CHINESE TEA" so cute n funny! hahaha

出乎意料

有时我真的觉得这个世界对我很不公平
尤其是今年 总觉得什么事情都不顺利
我真的认为 好心是没有好报的
我并不是要求回报 只是不希望被反咬一口而已
说实在的 我在这里不快乐 回去新加坡也不是很快乐
到哪里都会遇到不开心的事情 也要面对不一样的状况
也许这是步入adulthood的缺点吧
所有的事已经不像以前那么单纯简单了
要想很多 要考虑很多 要烦很多很多
我不敢想像以后的日子会是怎样 很多时候都是出乎意料的

18 more hours!

18 more hours and I'll be in the plane to melb
-.- -.- -.- -.- -.-

can i not go back?
i dread it i dread it..

HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR N V-DAY TO ALL!!

watched a super sad italian movie entitled "Life Is Beautiful (La vita è bella)".. now my mood sinks....so touching, sweet, funny n sad at the same time -.- -.-

2nd last day before i fly off to melb -.-

Dinner at newton circus with niao, fa lan si, songwei, junlong n mok..
Omg..everything is super yummy!!! I'm so gonna miss my fav hokkien mee & stingray.. haha..

After that, mok left to meet his friends.. and the rest of us went to marina sq. Wanted to watch movie.. but there wasnt any nice movie.. so we decided to sing k.. but KBOX is freaking ex.. $40 per person.. -.- -.- i think cos it's cny period. -.-

So in the end we went to sing at cuppage plaza.hahaha......

Me n Niao tried 六连拍！！！hahah.



Niao's solo attempt in 六连拍~


这里的朋友最真 最了解我 最关心我 这里才是属于我的地方
超级超级不想回去墨尔本
如果可以带大家一起过去多好啊
想到要一个人面对所有事情 就觉得郁闷 烦都烦死了！！
嗨嗨嗨~ 我不要回去 不要不要回去 不想不想回去！！
救救我 救救我 让我脱离苦海！！！！

哦。。还有。。
在这里我要非常非常感谢我亲爱的朋友们。。在我最失落的时候， 你们一直都在那儿给我支持，安慰与关心
我觉得 人总是要到这种时候 才会发觉到友情的可贵
虽然我失去了 但也换来了不少真正的友情
谢谢大家！！我会想念你们的！！！！！！ :)

Whats wrong with 2010?

I think i chose the right time to leave...
What is wrong with 2010? Why everything seems to turn out so bad?
BIG FIGHT before cny -.- -.- -.- -.- -.-
Sometimes I really think our parents don't listen and they are taking things too personally.
We are not against them, but they think we are..
They want us to listen, but they don't listen to what we are trying to tell them.
Maybe when people grow old.. they become stubborn n want everything their way -.- -.- -.- Always using an ultimatum wont solve anything.. it just makes things worse..
Well, happy new year to all! I hope things will change for the better..Hope everyone is healthy and stop quarrelling please.. The cny festive songs are already so noisy, don't add on to the pollution

2010 年安分守己

2010 年 我要安安分分的做人喽。。 哈哈哈。

2009 年。。 我对我自己太失望了。 认识一些不该认识的人。。被人家捅了一刀，才知道疼。。嗨~ 没关系啦。。 这是成长的一部分。。就认命吧。。

2010 年将会是一个新的开始 我不会再让那个忘恩负义的人影响我 他只是我人生一个小小 小小的污点。 没有他， 其实我活得更开心，更自在。 混蛋滚蛋吧。。 哈哈哈哈。 我骂的还挺爽的。 哈哈。。

J.co and The Nuts

Had fun yesterday!! hahaha. Met jiaxiang and kelly at sengkang mrt 1st.. then they accompanied me to tanjong pagar to pass my timesheets to the job agency. Thanks thanks! haha.

N we were talking nonsense and crapping all the way.. from noon till night HAHA

While waiting for the rest to come, me n jiaxiang sat at J.Co for hours, eating donuts and drinking chocolate freeze. haha

When Kelly came back to meet us again, we used her macbook photobooth to camwhore! hahahaha. so funny!!




















jx... french kissing himself .. he loves himself too much! hahah





nichelle, sean n yaohuang came n they joined in the fun!!






my BIG nose n nic's mushroom head!!! HAHAHAH



Then in the evening, we had dinner at a korean restaurant at bugis.. The food was kinda disappointment.. but the good company compensate the bad food hahaha.







edward tried to eat nichelle's mushroom head.. hahaha. sean blocked jeslin -.- haha.



nichelle commented that me n jx looked like a couple here hahahah. I'm JON and this is my gf, JANICE hahahahahahha



sean gave me this!!!.. awwww... HAHAHA.. no la.. cos I asked him to give me!! He also gave jeslin one hahah.. He's trying to set up a popcorn business, so we r his guinea pigs!! HAHA...Anyway, THANKS!!!!

Busy but fun fun week!

Went kbox with songwei, weichoon, weiqi n his 3 friends at marina sq just now. Quite fun ;) sang from 2pm-7pm. weiqi's fling can sing quite well.. n i think weiqi himself can sing very well also.. his voice is like zheng zhong ji! hahaha. Cos we sang zi zhao lang man together - the song by kelly chen n zheng zhong ji. And for a moment, I thought the analog was still on hahahaha.

Then I went to 313. Wanted to get a top from F21, but no size already .. sian -.- so i walked to taka.. had dinner at yoshinoya.

This is my last week in sg before I FLY off -.- -.- -.-

Am excited to meet many many people!!!

This is my schedule for this coming week..

Mon - Meet jx 1st.. then kelly... n then the rest(nic, jeslin, sean, maybe yaohuang & laoda) for dinner at bugis..

Tue - Gonna do my last min shopping for stuff I cant get in Melb.. such as my OLAY BODY BUTTER!! hahaha. Then am meeting my sis to colour hair n do hair treatment together!!!

Wed - Gotta get stuff from Audrey's mum :) Then am meeting niao for cny shopping.. anyone free on that day.. can join us!! Nic, u free??

Thurs - Meeting Tian at 5.30pm at jurong pt!! Remind me to bring her snacks!! HAHA..

Fri - am thinking of organising a reunion dinner/ gathering.. So just wait for my sms! hahaha.

Sat - Family reunion dinner at copthorn kings :)

Sun - FLY FLY FLY to Melb! :( :( -.- -.- -.- -.-

Haiz. I'm already starting to miss sg ..... though i'm still here hahahahah.
I don't wanna go back n face everything alone -.- Just the thought of it irks me.. -.- -.- -.- -.- -.-

p.s.

人因梦想而伟大 人因挫折而坚强 人因爱情而成长 人因亲情而幸福 人因友情而快乐！

Zoo & Gab's bday

My sis has free passes to the zoo! haha. so we went. Last feb, me n my sis went to melbourne zoo.. this feb, we went to singapore zoo hahaha.










happy v day in adv! :)

My fav jumbo the elephant! hahaha.

Then in the evening.. we went to swissotel to celebrate Gab's 9th birthday! haha. Had buffet..food was good! :) HAPPY BIRTHDAY GAB aka baboo!! :P

life..

I realize something about life.

People often say "what comes around goes around".. n they say that those who hurt others will get their retribution some day.

But i don't think this is what life is about. In the first place, God didn't create this world with the word 'retribution' in mind. God wants to spread love.. not hatred.

"What comes around goes around" happens because.. sometimes we make mistakes, without even realizing.. so we keep on repeating the same mistakes, over and over again.. so in order to help us repent.. God let us experience what others went through.. when we feel the pain, then we'll know what it's like.. then we'll start to learn. It's merely a learning curve. I guess there's no such thing as retribution.

Hahaha. Suddenly I sounded so religious.. n wise.

Anyway, met up with kelly n vincent yesterday. Had dinner at Ichiban Boshi. Thanks kelly n vincent for passing me the stuff! hahaha..

Met nichelle for dinner at bugis.. Finally ate my stingray! Lol. Thanks nic for the dessert treat!!! hahaha. n listening to my long long grandmother story hahaha.

ECP

jeslin really looked like a korean here! hahah. n this part of ecp doesnt look like it's in sg. lol.





Had fun at east coast park! we cycled for 2 hours!! hahah.. was freaking tired.. n i kept grumbling.. hahahahah. I kept telling jeslin that we should have rented the 2-in-1 bike.. so that the guys can do the cycling.. while the girls can just sit n enjoy the breeze hahahahahha.

slap of reality

i don't know what i did wrong to deserve this.
i'm not even asking him to give me anything in return.. but how can he be so cruel to me? i treated him so well.. but all i got in return was a painful slap of reality.
what others see or think, i don't really care. i only care about what matters to me.
anyway this world is like f--k. i wish the best of everyone, but the feeling is not always mutual. someone i labeled as 'a good friend' gave me a "haha" when i told her about the break-up. what has the world become? i'm so utterly disappointed.
the effort u put into anything, be it relationship or friendship, sometimes just doesn't turn out the way u want. so never have any expectation.. expectation only gives you more disappointment.
now i really wonder what's the point of being good to everyone? when you are nice to them, they simply take you for granted.. like it's your duty to serve them.
at least now, i know who is true to me, and who is apparently not.
i see their true colours n ugly personalities.
sometimes i wish i would never have to go back there again.. that part of the universe, is like the dark side.. n currently now, i'm in a safe and protected zone, where all the angels are surrounding me. but when i go back, i'll be all alone to face the devils n demons. maybe i should just stop seeing them. if they don't treat me like a proper friend, then why should i?
i'll just be nice to those who are nice to me.